Nyet that's MY mama!

Well today started out on a slightly sad note. Genrick went to get Gracie from her common room and when they were coming back, I heard a boom and a very sad cry. Gracie bumped her head as she was coming down the hall. Genrick being the guy that he is was holding her facing away from him. I went to them and held out my hands and she lept into my arms. I was still sad about her ouchy but my heart soared that she wanted ME!

We went to the special room and again played and played. She wasn't as busy as yesterday, but definitely had me running. The door was closed today so it was a little extra stuffy in there.

I brought some large drawing sheets and some colors for her and she really did like to color. But pretty soon, she had way too much energy to sit there any longer and to the ball pit we went. After awhile, Karina (my wonderful interpreter) recognized that typical "I gotta go potty" dance which must be universal. She asked Gracie if she had to go potty and she said yes. So Gracie grabbed my hand and off we went. Upstairs two flights and down the hall we entered a room that had 12 or so children in it that were all about Gracie's age. Gracie knew just what to do. She grabbed her pot and promptly sat down on it and did her business. While she was doing that, the kids in the room noticed us and all started gathering around me saying "mama". Gracie came out of that bathroom jumped into my arms and said NYET that's MY MAMA! I heard the nyet and could hear her tone which was very stern. Karina told me while she was giggling what Gracie was saying. I'M HER MAMA! It makes me cry even as I'm typing it.

We tried on some different clothes which Gracie thought was so fun. She had the cutest t-shirt and underpants on which looked brand new. I could see her scar on her chest and you can feel that her breast bone has been disrupted and put back together, but she is very ticklish and wouldn't let me get too long of a look. The 3T outfit is too big as I suspected. The 2T t-onsie that I brought is also slightly too big. The 18 month t-shirt fit her very nicely. She's a peanut. My camera battery died about that time so I wasn't able to get any pictures of her in the other outfits.

Then I tried to trace her foot. WAY too ticklish for that! But she tried to do it herself after that. She really liked the colors until I took them away because she tried to eat them. :)

When it was time to go, I walked her up to the common room again. She really didn't want to go back and tried to stay in a sitting room just outside. I gave her hugs and kisses and whispered in her ear how many people she has that love her. Mama most of all. She was so full of hugs today and gave me lots of love. I don't know how I can just leave her in 3 more days. It's going to be too hard. Makes me cry some more.

On a very sad note, Karina said the workers told her of a girl Alice I think who is also listed on Reeces Rainbow. She is a couple of months younger than Gracie I think. Alice was considered to be unteachable so she was transferred to the institution recently. Makes my heart sad because she is one that I was drawn to. Her picture looked so sweet and gentle. I find it so hard to ignore all the others whom I can't help and can do nothing about. Why does it have to be that way?

Paka,

Deana