New picture!! Look at my serious girl!

What a good surprise I got today when my friend Amy found a newly posted picture of Gracie on the Russian database of orphans. Doesn't she look so very serious? Can't wait to put a smile on that face. So glad that May is just around the corner!

A year and a half

A year and a half ago today I committed to adopt and bring home a little girl from Russia. Little did I know the journey I would go on. I think it is amazing that today God used this passage from Our Daily Bread to encourage me.

Dealing With Delay

In April 2010, clouds of ash spewed by a volcano in Iceland closed airports across the UK and Europe for 5 days. Nearly 100,000 flights were canceled and millions of passengers around the world found themselves in an enormous holding pattern on the ground. People missed important events, businesses lost money, and no one knew when it would end.

When our plans fall apart and there is no remedy, how do we deal with frustration and delay? Isaiah 26:3-4 is an anchor for our souls in every storm of life: "You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You. Trust in the Lord forever, for in (Jehovah), the Lord is everlasting strength." Whether we're facing annoying inconvenience or heartbreaking loss, this rock-solid promise is worth memorizing and repeating every night when we close our eyes to sleep.

Today, when plans are shattered, do our minds dwell on the circumstances or on the Lord? During frustrating delay, can we still trust the loving heart of God? In the hymn "Like a River Glorious," Frances Havergal so beautifully expressed what we long for. -David McCasland

Hidden in the hollow of His blessed hand,

Never foe can follow, never traitor stand;

Not a surge of worry, not a shade of care,

Not a blast of hurry touch the spirit there.

Stayed upon Jehovah, hearts are fully blest,

Finding as He promised, perfect peace and rest.__Havergal

I remember how devastated I was when my adoption suffered it's first major delay when a child was sent back to Russia alone. Sadness overwhelmed me at times and I spent much time searching for the answer that would explain how someone could be so irresponsible and cause so much damage to so many people, to so many children not to mention her own adopted child.

I also remember thinking how I could have been stuck in Russia during the very time referenced here. How devastated that I would have been if I had been stuck overseas when this volcano blew it's top and so many people had to find new plans as they dealt with their delay. I remember thanking God that I didn't have to deal with that sort of delay.

Then during another time of waiting, I remember praising God that I was home safe as a room in the Moscow airport was bombed. The same room I had been in just a few months earlier and if I had gotten my way, could have been in at the time of the bombing.

So now, as I sit yet again for another delay, I am here asking God to help me see the reason that I am waiting again and see what He wants me to learn from this. Undoubtedly, I am learning to look to God through this process.

I know that God has His reasons for the delays and I'm trying to keep my eyes focused on Him. Sometimes I fail at it and sometimes I don't get the lesson until after the fact, but God is faithful and Gracie will come home. And in the meantime, I pray that I use this time well and that God will gently remind me to keep my eyes on Him.

Joe and Anni Ross of Broken Bow along with Alice Ross (Grandmother of the bride) of Ten Sleep, WY, Deana Clifton of Cairo, and Craig Clifton of Denham Springs Louisiana along with Ken and Shirley Macke (Grandparents of the groom) of Mullen, NE, are happy to announce the upcoming marriage of their children Emilie Ross and Tyler Macke.

Emilie is the 2007 graduate of Broken Bow High School and a 2010 graduate of University of Nebraska at Kearney with a Bachelor of Science degree in Family studies. Emilie plans to further her education by enrolling in a masters program in Oregon.

Tyler is a 2005 graduate of Grand Island Senior High School and a 2010 graduate of University of Nebraska at Kearney with a Bachelor of Science degree in Industrial Distribution. Tyler is employed by Eaton Corporation as an electrical sales engineer.

A May 28, 2011 wedding is planned in Kearney, NE. The couple will reside in Wilsonville, Oregon after the wedding.

MAKES A MAMA PROUD

Proud of my big girl

Today I was able to watch my daughter Sydney perform a solo at the final performance of the year for the 2010 UNK Nebraskats show choir. It was a great way to wind up the year with a good solo. She did a great job and every once in a while, I get a little choked up watching my girl sing and do what she loves to do so much. Today was one of those times. And just in case she reads this post, I'm proud of you Sydney. Not just for your voice, but every day. I love you!

http://youtu.be/xrNtaRLu9lU

Well, Monday was a bittersweet day as I guessed it would be. Gracie celebrated one more birthday without her mama's arms around her. I don't know if anyone told her happy birthday or not. I did even though she didn't hear me.

In addition to not being there, Monday became even more bitter to me because I was informed by my agency that the judge who will hear my case is now on vacation. AGAIN! If you remember, her last vacation was a month long vacay in December. Now, in April, she apparently needs another month long getaway. Somehow I think I'm in the wrong business if vacations come around that often for them.

As you can imagine, I spent much of Monday in tears. My papers have been removed from the judges desk in order to keep them from ending up on the "bad" judges desk, and they'll be presented to her again once she's back around the first of May. They said that they can work around my son's wedding and will make sure I'm able to be here for it. Of course, many of my documents will be expired before that date comes, so once again, I'm in the paper chase. Or will be as soon as they tell me they want them.

On a much better note, I got an update. I was told to compile a list of questions for the Russian staff and they would send answers and maybe a picture or two. Well, I got both today! God is good to give me encouragement in this stage of the game. I sure needed it. I didn't get an answer to all of my questions, but at least got some info on her.

She is well and has been healthy since I left her. Thank You God!

She is still in the baby house she was in and will remain there until she is adopted. Again, THANK YOU GOD!!!!!

I asked if it would be possible to try to shoot for court around the 3rd week of May so I could fly home for the wedding which is on the 28th and then fly back to bring Gracie home. They said that there is no way to tell when court might be because the judge may require other papers to be furnished.

Now, for the good part. I really didn't expect to be so very emotional at the sight of these pictures. All at once, I was so very moved by so many emotions. All boiling down to how much I love this little girl and how much I miss her. So, here we go.....

Her infant picture that I only got a glimpse of earlier. Look how cute she was!

Getting ready to go outside....or coming in from outside. Not sure which. Maybe coming in since her cheeks are so pink. Healthy pink. :O)

She looks a bit mischievous here. Don't you think? I love it!

Good thing her mama got a coat that will fit her!

She's so cute!

Post snack I think.

I remember this face! The orphanage workers used to tell her to put her tongue in. They said it in Russian of course, so I could never repeat it, but it was so cute that she thought it was funny to pull her tongue in and would say "UP" as she pulled her tongue in.

Her hair is growing so long.

And my favorite picture! Food face and all!

This mamas heart is both light and heavy. Have I ever mentioned that I love this girl?

I want her home!

Happy Birthday sweet little one

6 Months Ago

I left my home to meet my daughter. It was the scariest thing I have ever done and as I sat alone in the Moscow airport, I thanked God that I didn't know how scared I would be when I started this journey. If I had known, I may not have gotten this far. Exhausted and alone, I was nothing more than a scared child in a very large, strange world. Kind of reminds me of a certain little girl I got to know.

God knew I needed you though. I'm so glad He did.

She was exactly 4 1/2 that day and today my baby girl turns 5. Something I didn't think she would have to do without me. I spend time wondering if she is still so small. If she's had her lessons each day, if she's been playing outside like she surely would be if she was here at home, if we're ever going to get that stubborn nose dried up or are we going to have to carry her blotto with us forever. I don't care, I'll gladly do it.

I have birthday presents for you. I wonder if you will like clothes or toys or both. I can hardly wait to find out. We'll have a party for you and I'll spend my time making up for every hug, every happy birthday utterance and every kiss you've missed out on over these last 5 years.

And, if I can make any promise to you Gracie, it will be that you never have to see another birthday go by without a celebration of YOU and of the gift that you are to me.

I love you little girl!

A quick praise

Thank You God

The family that had to go before the judge who refused Kirill his right to a loving family was successful in court on Friday, April 1. There is one less orphan in the world and this little girl has opened the doors for several other children in hopes of adoption in that region of Russia.

Please continue to pray for Kirill and his family. The judge can reverse her original decision before the papers go to the supreme court of Russia. How nice it would be for these children to both come home this month.