What if......Lord help me see

The last couple of weeks have been ones of trial for so many. Weeks of waiting, weeks of fear, weeks of pain and probably hardest of all, weeks of doubt.



From the child denied a family.

To an 11 pound 3 year old slowly being deprived of her life.....

Lately I've been struggling with the whys and the what ifs. Why are things harder, longer, darker, worse than I thought they would be? Why do some journeys seem so simple and easy and others so hard? What if children were valued and not thrown away? What if this journey was easier? Would I understand God's blessings then? Would I recognize a blessing through the sting of tears? My fear is that I wouldn't. My prayer is that I do.

God help me see your blessings in situations like these. Help me to learn from the disappointments, from the hardships and the fears. Help me to find peace and comfort in turmoil. Help me discern your mercies in disguise. Listen......

PS...The child's family is appealing the judges ruling. Please pray that it will be overturned. And the little girl in the second picture is receiving treatment now in a U.S. hospital. Please pray that it's not too late for her. Thank you God for the family that rescued her.

fun at the Wal-Mart

I had a little fun the other day at Wal-Mart. These are what I came up with. How I long for more pictures of her to share. Nevermind, I just long for her!

What do you think?

I think I need to find more options, but it's a start. :)

I think Gracie won her over!

Well, I have a little story to tell you.

Last week I took over the care of a cute little 90 year old guy who lives by himself and has two caregivers that tend to him every day through the week. One of the caregivers is a VERY gruff and sometimes grumpy lady who is almost as old as my patient is. She's prone to yelling and now is known for her biting and sarcastic remarks as she hangs up on you. That was my introduction to "Joanne". She wanted my cell number. I'll give her some credit and say that it was for the benefit of her charge, but do you think I would give her that number? Absolutely not!! Why would I ever do that? I have reiterated multiple times that it's simply against company policy to give our cell numbers to patients for the primary reason that it's not a 24 hour number and we have a 24 hour call system for any calls they needed to make.

As I met my new patient and his caregivers, I revealed a little bit about myself. I told them about my big kids and also told them about this amazing, exciting, painful process known as Gracie's adoption. I didn't elaborate much, but I did let them know that one goal I have is to achieve stability with him before I leave for my adoption. Of course, not knowing when that will happen, I'm trying to rush to that point of stability. :)

I could see Joanne's demeanor soften as I continued to talk. Her gruffness eased and she actually had a faint smile on her face. She later told me in private that she had herself been adopted and she was moved and blessed when she heard of my adoption. In her lifetime, she has rarely opened up about this to anyone.

Today we talked again about the adoption. We talked about the pain she felt when kids would tease her about being adopted. She had a good upbringing and was well loved by her adoptive family which includes her now 62 year old sister who has Down syndrome. :) I immediately whipped out my favorite picture (conveniently located as my wallpaper on my laptop) of Gracie. She grinned ear to ear. She's so excited to meet Gracie when she comes home. Even my patient shared in the moment and told of two little girls that he and his wife had adopted and how wonderful it was to be their father.

Gracie's done it again. In fact, I'll go out on a limb and say that she'll do it again and again. She's stolen someone's heart without even so much as a hug or a kiss. How blessed am I that I've gotten those hugs and several kisses to go with them. I can't wait for more!

LOVE THIS GIRL!!!!